May 15thThat’s What Friends Are For

There’s a direct correlation between the people you spend the most time with and your own life.  If you’re surrounded by optimistic friends and family, you’re much more likely to be positive. If most of your besties are overweight, studies indicate that it’s highly likely you will also be carrying extra pounds.  If the majority of people you interact with are motivated and successful, chances are very good that you will have similar drive and success.

For better or for worse, consciously or not, your friends have a major impact on who you are and what you do. So if we’re in the business of making friends, shouldn’t we set our sights on the best and the brightest? What kind of people do you want influencing your life? What characteristics do you want to build in yourself? Those are the types of friends you want to draw into your circle, are they not?

My sister and I took a painting class a couple of years ago. ** Turned out that the teacher was this uber foxy Brazilian gal. As the course progressed I learned that not only was my teacher beautiful, but she was talented, driven, generous, motivated, kind, smart, successful and really REALLY cool. Plus, she was born exactly one day before me! I decided that she and I absolutely needed to be friends.

But I was a little intimidated. She was so beautiful and so cool and seemed to have her life so together. Did she really need a new friend? And would she even want to be friends with someone who was her student? How on earth do you go about asking your teacher to hang out with you?!

I decided to assume that she would indeed want to be friends with me, and to just go for it. So I invited her to a house party I was having. Her reaction was The Best: “You want ME to come to your party?!” She enthusiastically agreed to come, although when the night arrived she was unable to attend. I was a bit disappointed, but that didn’t stop me from inviting her when I had some of my girl friends over a few weeks later. That time she showed up, and we found out we had all sorts of things in common. She also “confessed” how during class she kept thinking how cool me and my sister were, and how she wished she could be friends with us! But she didn’t think it would be appropriate for her to try and hang out with her students, which is why she seemed a bit reserved, and also why she was so thrilled when I invited her out.

Fast forward through coffee dates, art gallery viewings, cooking classes, lots of wandering around town, and a couple of years: Lucky me, I now consider her one of my best friends.

So our fifth and final lesson in making friends, now that we know how to recognize the friendship sparks and how to fan them into flames, is to Be Choosy. It’s not about going all highschool cheerleader on potential friend candidates. It’s about intentionally drawing only the best, brightest, happiest and most supportive people into your life circle, so that through their influence you can become Your best, brightest and happiest! And THAT is what friends are for.

** If you are interested in taking an awesome Fearless Abstract Painting class, or want to purchase some one-of-a-kind artwork, please visit: www.samanthadasilva.com